Demi Lovato has blamed her sobriety slip on her “very unhealthy” obsession with the gym in her first official media appearance since her near-fatal drug overdose last year.
The Sorry Not Sorry hitmaker returned to the public eye on Saturday as she took the stage at the Teen Vogue Summit in Los Angeles, where she reflected on the lessons learned following her health scare, which resulted in her hospitalization in July, 2018.
Telling fans she was “a little nervous” for her “first public thing back”, Demi admitted, “I’ve changed a lot. I’ve gone through a lot.”
The singer then opened up about her most recent substance abuse issues, and how her struggle with body acceptance had pushed her over the edge.
“Whenever I was in the gym over the past couple years, I was doing it to a very unhealthy extreme. I think that’s what led me down a darker path,” she said. “For me, embracing my body the way that it is naturally was the reason why I took the month of October off from the gym.”
Demi admitted she used to preach all about body positivity, but it’s only recently that she’s really come to “be OK” with her figure.
“I don’t have to lie to myself and tell myself that I have this amazing body,” she shared. “It’s like, if I don’t feel it, I don’t have to say that. All I have to say is I’m healthy. In that statement, I express gratitude and I express I am grateful for my strength.”
Demi also touched on the heavy criticism she faced following her drug relapse, insisting she isn’t as emotionally strong as she used to pretend to be.
“What a lot of people don’t realize is that I’m actually an extremely sensitive person,” she shared.
“I am human, so be easy on me. And I’m so tired of pretending like I’m not human. That’s one thing that I won’t do anymore. When you say stuff, it affects me. I’m human. I try not to look, but I see it.”
The pop star revealed she is currently working on new music and screen projects, although she is hesitant to put a timeline on when fans can expect a release.
“It’s important to remember that I am so cautious this time around of jumping back into things,” she continued. “I’ve really decided to take my time with things, so when the time is right to release new music, I will put it out there… I am dying to release new music.”
When she is ready to fully launch her comeback, Demi hopes her talents will outshine her personal struggles.
“Genuinely I just want people to remember that I’m a singer,” she said. “I think that a lot of the things I’ve been through kind of outshined my successes in the music industry or acting now. I just want people to remember that that’s what I want to give to the world so please focus on that and not the other things.”
And despite her career ups and downs, the former child star insists she “wouldn’t change” the path she’s taken through life so far: “I would never regret anything,” she smiled. “I love the person that I am today.”