Lindsay Lohan initially accepted the "safe chaos" that came with dating ex-fiance Egor Tarabasov because their relationship mirrored her parents' when she was growing up.
The 30-year-old actress got engaged to the Russian businessman last April, but called time on their romance in July, following a series of violent rows, including one which was caught on video showing Lindsay claiming he almost killed her in her London home.
During an interview on U.K. TV show John Bishop: In Conversation With…, Lindsay admitted that subconsciously she believed the volatile nature of the pairing was normal, because her mother and father, Dina and Michael Lohan, had a similar dynamic in their relationship while the actress and her siblings grew up.
"Of course, as a child, you recognize, in psychiatry it's a study, those moments become almost like a safe chaos and you just think it's normal, but it's not normal, and I remember saying to myself that moment when he ran out of my house, 'Thank God'," she remembered. "I was like, 'Oh my God, I'm not going to put myself through what my mother went through, no. This ends now.'"
It was the end of her relationship with Egor that led Lindsay to decide to work with refugees in Syria.
"I took control back in my life and said, 'No one is going to hurt me, I'm gonna help other people and focus on taking care of myself,'" she smiled.
She turned 30 last July, and added to comedian John that she saw the landmark birthday as representing a new start in her life.
"I think I've just started everything I want to do. My own company, my own production company, my own management company, my own charity," she said. "I think everything started after my 30th birthday and I weirdly knew that for some reason."